#i'll take 'context what context' for $500 alex

[likearolloftape]

[randomthefox]

You know, if XDAmz were smarter, they'd get somebody else to send you anonymous asks so that their writing style doesn't tip you off.

It's not like there wouldn't be people jumping at the bit. The problem is that they annoy so many people with their screenshotted posts that even their own friends get sick of it. They always apologize, only to wind up doing it all over again days later. I'm sure this ask will end up on their Twitter too. Hi, world!

...anyway, I'll take "tongue-in-cheek statements that make me sound suspiciously like a villain when taken out of context" for 500, Alex?

At this point is would be less revealing if he just didn't even bother with google translate and actually just sent his native japanese text over. At least that would confuse me for a couple minutes.

It is really funny that they're so far gone that they don't realize that everybody they spam screenshots of my posts at is annoyed AT THEM for doing it. Most of them have already blocked me because of XDamz and his little cabal's slander anyway. And guess what, them blocking me means THEY DON'T WANT TO SEE MY BULLSHIT ANYMORE. It's not like they're going to appreciate being continuously exposed to me after they went through the trouble of blocking me specifically to ensure they never have to see anything I say ever again.

But hey, if they had the capacity to realize how what they're doing comes off as insane and creepy and annoying, then they wouldn't be obsessive stalkers in the first place would they? Catch -22 and all that.

[chaifootsteps]

I'll take mad king paranoia for 500 Alex.

All joking aside, looking at who Vivziepop surrounds herself with and works with, I wouldn't be surprised if she really is paranoid that one day one of the people she surrounds herself with might throw her under the bus like she has done to so many other people. Might also explain why she has her own personal army of lawyers.

That unhinged rant about KediKatzen was what sealed it for me. For context, this was about the transphobia doc, which KediKatzen had absolutely nothing to do with, but Vivzie somehow came to the conclusion in her paranoid brain that they were the mastermind.

[clumsyartish]

OMG IT'S OUT, IT'S OUT IT'S OUT!! Yes I watched it immediately after it came out in the middle of the night and I'll have to be up in like 4 hours but here it is.. My favorite

Rwrb quotes THAT MADE IT!! (And movie-only moments I'm still dying 4)

PS: DON'T READ IF YOU DON'T WANT ANY SPOILERS (everything is out of context tho)

"Yes and I can assure you that making it was one of the most depressing moments of my career"

(Alex, it's good to see you... Sober) -OMG HENRY SLAY

"HRH PRINCE DICKHEAD💩"

"but we were ever so careful dear"

The turkey /cornbread knows my sins Henry [sort of]

"he's named after Bowie"

"Do you ever wonder who you'd be if you were some anonymous person in the world?... You're as thick as it gets"

(I totaly... Privately called that)

"here's what we're gonna do... You're gonna stay atleast 500 feet away from me..."

"As gay as a maypole"

(I have no idea what a maypole is... Are they known for their homosexual tendencies?)

(there's two things I've been dying to ask you)

(Who says make love anymore? Are we gonna like... Listen to Lana del Rey while we do it?)

[Alex faceplant on the bed after the Texas montage, Cuz lmao same]

(and I told my sistaaah... She was really happy for us... Tihi)

"everytime I see you it takes another year off of my life"

(we're gonna need some pizza)

"you need to figure out if you feel forever about him"

(dad what is this music? It's so not the vibe)

[ALEX READING ONE LAST STOP OMFG]

"please, have a little more faith in your old man"

"sometimes you just gotta jump, hope you're not standing on a cliff"

(I seriously doubt that x2)

(it's like there's a rope attached to my chest and.... *aaaaaaah*)

[I'm sorry, I know it's really emotional and all but the way Alex is just standing right up like 🧍‍♂️ while Henry swims away had me laughing to tears]

"if you want me to leave you'll have to tell me to leave" {aaaaaaahh}

(The dancing... THE FUCKING DANCING)

(WHEN THEY WRITE THE HISTORY OF MY LIFE I WANT IT TO INCLUDE YOU. And my LOVE FOR YOU!!)

"HISTORY, HUH?

BET WE COULD MAKE SOME"

(and I'm not gonna get any work done until you let these lovesick homosexuals on the phone with one another)

((hurry, please)I'll break the sound barrier for you)

(I HAVE, read your emails HENRY!)[I'm sorry I can't bahaha]

(Beca-Beca-Because)

(homosexssssiual)

(I think that's up for debate)

(Oh shut up your majesty)

[iamanartichoke]

So I'm looking for Thor spoilers, as you do, and I ended up on the Marvel spoilers subreddit, where I found and read a few Christian Bale interviews. And, well, I'll take Takes I Wasn't Expecting From Christian Bale For $500, Alex.

Cut; I don't think this is spoilery, but idk what people are considering spoilers at this point, so just to be on the safe side. (Also for length, this got long. And mostly pointless.)

Article Link.

"There's an awful lot that I wish was in this film, which you can't have a four-hour long film because there's so much gold that's on the cutting room floor, hilarious stuff, and creepy as hell stuff, but that was perhaps pushing it to a realm where maybe it wouldn't have been able to be family friendly, which we always wanted it to be. But Taika's sensibility, the comedy, the tragedy, the ability to have the Taika-ness and the humor of that. But he's got great sincerity as well. He's a real artist. And so, man, it's moving. That is the bloody surprising thing with this film. It's a very moving film and then two seconds later, you're laughing your ass off."

Incidentally, Christian has nothing but complimentary things to say about the rest of the cast as well, and specifically made mention of how welcoming Chris was (which might be in a different interview than the one I linked).

But, yeah. I'm not really sure why this perfectly lovely take surprises me, except to say that maybe seeing someone of Christian's status, I guess? expressing such admiration and respect for Taika is unexpected to me? By "status," I don't mean to undermine anyone else's accomplishments, as I obviously recognize the credibility of the actors who've worked with and praised Taika in the past -

- but, for me, I just consider Christian to be on his own level. The types of projects he tends to choose, how absolutely talented he is, how clearly intellectual he is - I may be biased due to having been a fan for literally most of my life (since the early 90s! Fuck I'm old), but I just have a lot of respect for him and have (somewhat subconsciously) elevated him to a bit higher on the totem pole of admiration. Even higher than Tom.

This was going to be a sidenote, but it turned into its own paragraph: I love Tom. I do. I got on a plane for Tom. I didn't get on a bus when I lived in Boston and Christian was filming American Hustle two towns over. My regard for both of them is clearly very different, and I'm not really sure how to explain it. I don't think that either is better than the other, in terms of talent/skill, but I do think that Christian is the more accomplished, experienced actor. Which makes his compliments for Taika hold more weight for me than Tom's?

Which sounds bad, but all I mean is that Tom was, obviously, very much a part of the Thor universe, he was entrenched in the role by the time Ragnarok came around, he had relationships with all the cast, and I think being in that position would hinder one's objectivity not just for the role but for the movie/universe in general. And, while I appreciate very much that Tom never has a bad thing to say about anyone - well, at the same time, Tom never has a bad thing to say about anyone, so whether he truly enjoyed working with Taika, especially in that context, or if he was just being diplomatic when promoting the film is anyone's guess.

Contrastingly, Christian is brand new to the MCU, to Taika, Chris and the cast (mostly), and to the Thor universe in general. Coming in as a blank slate like that, again, combined with Christian's body of work and tendency to be straightforward with his feelings (he's always very polite and complimentary, but he's not nice the way Tom is? Again, I don't know how to explain the difference, except to say I've never felt like he gives "fluff" answers; he doesn't heap on the praise if it's unwarranted, either (in my observations, anyway) - would naturally, I imagine, give him a much more objective point of view about the experience, making his feedback feel more legit, in a "here's my unbiased yet professional opinion (and I know what I'm talking about)" kind of way.

(I don't think I'm words-ing very well but) the thing is, I've always been lukewarm about Taika, at best. I've said this ad nauseum, but despite being critical of it, I liked Ragnarok. But I liked it as its own separate film. I didn't like it as part of the Thor franchise; I didn't like it as an overall story bc I didn't think it was well-written, and there were a lot of "problematic" implications within said story. Others have criticized it more thoroughly, but I have certainly done my fair share. And I think I mostly still have those opinions.

But I was way, way more upset about Infinity War than I could have ever been about Ragnarok, so that softens it a bit, too. And, look, this doesn't apply to anyone I am currently still mutuals with, but it does apply to a lot of former mutuals - regarding Ragnarok, at the height of wankness there was a lot of meta being passed around and analyzed and whatnot that made it easy to sort of spiral down into an echo chamber, encouraged by people who, again, include former mutuals who seem to feed on the negativity, despite claiming otherwise ("we wanted to like it, honest; endlessly criticizing hurts us more than it hurts you," etc). And the way that this dynamic played out - and is still playing out - after the Loki series came out was extremely eye-opening (and disappointing) to me bc suddenly, people whose Ragnarok takes elicited "yasss" from me were suddenly (I felt) posting takes that not only did I (sometimes wildly) disagree with, but that were fueled by an element of vitriol that fed right into the negativity (and made me very uncomfortable).

That's neither here nor there at the moment, just context I guess, but my point is that while I mostly maintain that Ragnarok is fine/enjoyable as a standalone film but has issues (at best) as part of the Thor franchise, said opinion left me feeling very "meh" about Taika as a filmmaker. I never hated him as much as some other people did (I hate(d) the Russos and Infinity War a lot more, fuck those assholes) but I didn't really respect him, either. And despite being interested in Thor 4 and excited for Christian Bale, I'm not really approaching it with any expectations of being blown away by the film itself; I'm mostly assuming it's mediocre.

Which - all of this was just a really rambly way of saying, well shit, if Christian Bale's probably-objective opinion is such a glowing review, maybe I should re-assess how I view Taika as a filmmaker? Maybe I shouldn't be so quick to dismiss this movie as "probably mediocre but it's Thor with Christian Bale so sign me the fuck up." Actually give it a fair chance. I mean, shit, I could still walk away from it saying, "Nah, my opinion hasn't changed, definitely mediocre," but at least it'd be a more genuine take, I suppose.

There is literally no point to this post, sorry. It's 1:30am and I'm having all kinds of feelings and I'm just Like This, okay?

Also, I just realized I didn't actually find any fucking spoilers.

[infinitethree]

Alright this time this is for Theo. Here’s a little context for why your father decided to jump out a window: “Ok SO! Incredibly cursed idea incoming, directed at Day. One day in your multiversal travels you come across a version of you, not Dream, but you, in a happy and loving relationship with Philza Minecraft, the other world’s version of Darkza. However this relationship came to be, whether it’s after Kristin and Phil split or they have an open relationship does not matter. What would your reaction be?”. I sent him this message. Also, I know exactly who Philza Minecraft is. It’s why I chose him and not someone like George. Have a nice day now!

Theo is starting to suspect that the askers find his suffering entertaining.

It's the only reason he can find for why the context of the incident that happened half a day ago pops into his head right when he takes a swig of his soda.

Naturally, half of it is spat back out and a fourth of it exits via his nose. The last fourth feels like it went straight into his lungs. None of those should have any liquids going through them that way, much less a carbonated one.

Plus now his shirt, the couch, and the coffee table are going to be both damp and sticky. The later two can be cleaned fairly easily--and are marred by far more dubious stains anyway--but he does not want to admit to Aver that he may have fucked up another of his casual wear shirts.

Aver–Tommy Prime–was terrifying in a way that Theo never would have imagined he could become when he first met him. You just didn’t cross the guy, because he’s the single most powerful person on the server. Aver has a stranglehold on the entire clothing and fabric import, production, and export related to the server. Anything related to that goes through him at one point or another–up to and including employing at least a dozen other Tommys full time.

He also runs off of spite and probably-eldritch coffee. The guy is cool, but he also maybe scared Theo a tiny bit. Hard not to respect, or not be glad he adored Lee. Said little brother has been learning sewing and embroidery from him for years now; Lee has a voracious appetite for learning any and every skill he could convince anyone to teach him.

Not that any of that will help him when Aver pulls out Seam Ripper to run him through. "Fuckin'--why?!" He's irritated, despairing, and overall unhappy with this entire turn of events. The Fates chitter in amusement at him, though.

I'll take weirdest things a voice in someone's head has said for 500, Alex No no some of you have said WAY weirder shit! I agree, some of you are cringe as hell Lmao look at this guy, thinks cringe culture isn't even deader than Niki Yeah, what rock have you been living under?? Same one that Lucid's sense of style crawled out from, apparently Ooooh burn

Theo puts his head in his hands and sighs. At least this train of thought might distract them from examining what just happened too closely. "Some of you have said some real fuckin’ weirdchamp things before, agreed."

Rude Hey in my defense…the frog looked tasty It was bright red tho??? Yeah like candy! Cherry flavored frog!! Bright colors means poison you piece of soggy toast Okay but if it was one of the ones that gets you high, it would have been VERY funny– Double D would have been mad tho He would have probably found it funny Not if we got Theo killed?!

"A frog wouldn't have fuckin’ killed me, I'm too incredibly pog for that," Theo argues. He’s more than a little offended that they think so little of him. They've been in his head over a decade, they should know better by now. "I would simply not die. Nature fuckin’ quivers before me."

Yeah okay, tell that to a box jellyfish Or a creeper Pfft you should go tell Sam he should quiver before you He DOES though???

His lip curls at the thought of the creeper hybrid. Sam never truly got off his shit list--his crimes may have been largely in his dad’s first life, but…well. Theo forgives nothing and no one for harming his family.

It didn't help that Theo had been forced to watch how the baseline version of the Vault went down at his dad's side. Or, more accurately, sat with him at the bottom of the lava wall and tried to ground him while they both did their best to block out Dream’s screams.

So, yeah, any Sam involved in shady shit related to the Vault was automatically on his bad side.

He's too wrapped up in his own thoughts to attempt herding the metaphorical cats in his head. This proves to be his downfall.

Wait…isn't that basically just selfcest? What the FUCK are you talking about Double D and Phil thing! Think about it, Double D is like…mostly Phil, right? I--no?? How does that make any sense??? I'm lost here too, actually No, no, that's a fair point. Double D is something like 4/5ths Philza, if we count memories as time he lived– DO we count them though??? He does! Yeah, see! Exactly! It TOTALLY counts, therefore we're entering very dangerous territory–

Desperately trying to reign in their bullshit before it ends with him needing to book a therapy appointment again, he tells them, "I'd fuckin’ appreciate if you all wouldn't discuss the idea of my dad n’ Philza being together or the--Dad is not mostly Philza, that's just fuckin stupid!"

Dee takes this exact moment to hop down from the level above and land right in front of his brother. His eyes are narrowed slightly in that way they get when he's trying to figure out if being nosy is worth the possible costs. He evidently decides they are because he asks, "...Care to explain?"

Theo isn't going to suffer through this alone; if this bullshit is being inflicted on him, he’s sharing that burden. He immediately says, "Dad got a real fuckin’ weirdchamp question asking how he would react to seeing a version of himself–him, not Dream–dating a version of Phil. His response was to just fuckin’ fling himself out the window. And now the Fates are fuckin’ debating if it counts as selfcest because of the ratio of memories that are Dad’s versus the ones from Phil. And now I got the same question for context because I was real fuckin’ confused."

After a moment to digest that, Dee gives a thoughtful hum. "I see." He pauses, and then adds, "I deeply regret asking. But since I did, I'm going to say for the sake of my sanity that it's not. As funny as it would be to tell Dad not to pull a Onceler on us, others are already doing that way more clearly. Fates, please stop creating cognitohazards. Theo is enough of one already."

Theo's outraged squawk is coupled with loud laughter from the Fates.

Dee saw where I was going with that!!! Theo tell your older brother he's the second best Wait you were thinking of Onceler??? In this day and age??? Some of us are haunted by those dark, dark times I thought it was all very entertaining, actually And that's why we keep a spritz bottle for YOU I've evolved beyond being afraid of that!! I'm stronger now. I am unstoppable– Yeah that's why there’s a second bottle with bleach. Oh that sounds painful actually. No thanks!

As always, Theo has very little clue what the fuck is happening with them. Is it a bit? Are they actually capable of spritzing wayward members of the chorus with bleach? Is he just trying to do anything to get the idea of his dad dating Philza out of his head?

Only one of those he knows the answer to for sure. He looks up at his brother and tells him, "I'm going to go find Lee and get him to test an experimental potion on me. Anything to skip past this fuckin’ bullshit." He gets up and starts to leave, when Dee shouts after him, "Clean up the soda first, you asshole!" "Sorry, can't hear you over the sound of trying to ignore the fuckin’ bullshit going in my head!" "Theo I swear to fucking Prime if you don't get back here–"

Theo hastens his pace to run and launch himself off the deck and into the air. "Nope! Go fuck yourself!" He throws a middle finger back at Dee as he gains height and, more importantly, distance from him. He curves away from that section of the house because Dee is a bullshit good shot with arrows.

…Though it may have been worth it to get shot a few times rather than deal with whatever Dee will come up with to get back at him for this.

Eh, that’s a problem for future-Theo. Present-Theo is just trying to distract himself from whatever the fuck the Fates are up to in his head.

[thatslayer]

I'll take 8 and 10 for 500 Alex.

✍ Finally, an ask-meme for writers! ✍

08: What’s the best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten?

Writing for yourself is great but the reader matters, too. Make sure what you're writing can be understood out of context, that the reader doesn't have to read minds to figure out what's going on.

10: What’s your biggest writer pet-peeve?

Changing a canon character so much they're unrecognizable in print. Basically just a pretty FC with no resemblance to the original character. If you have to fundamentally change someone in order to like them, you didn't like them in the first place. If you have to twist and warp them to make a story or ship work, I sort of don't want to write with you. --- Also, don’t love it when people only care about a character’s sexuality and disregard the rest.